"A goodbye isn't painful unless you know you're not going to see eachother again."

And that's just the thing; we don't know when we will see each other again. Hopefully next summer, God willing. But sometimes the hardest thing to do is to say "goodbye." Especially if you aren't quite sure when you'll see each other again.

That's just how it was for me and my kids at the end of my missions trip. My two favorite boys, Simon and Elijah were having the most trouble with this. Well, Simon in particular.

First thing you should know was that these kids were the most loveable kids. Whenever i saw them they would always come up to me and give me hugs.



But on this night for example, after the service which ended our week, Simon came up to me and just wouldn't let go! Literally, he was glued to me for 10 minutes, if not more!! No lie!! :) He also wanted to keep taking pictures of us. After awhile, i was getting tired of it b/c i looked oh so silly (Inna, Julia, Kels, forgive me...) so i just started making it all the worse, by making weird faces! :P (actually, they are pretty scary- you can see my nose hairs!!)lol

Simon would, at some points even have his head buried in me, and i now wonder if he was crying b/c that's what he did when i walked past him in the car. But in the midst of our hugging other kids had to come up to me and give me hugs too....they ended up hugging part of Simon as well b/c he just refused to let go. Then, Elijah joined in on our hug and he was doing that for quite some time too as well as this other little boy(who's name i hate to say i forget...) and this little girl named Faith.



It was truly sooo priceless...and made me feel like crying, but i held myself in...not for too long though.



On my way walking to the bus, i saw Simon and Elijah in their van, waiting for their foster mom to come. Holding my breath i walk past them, deciding it would be best not to go over there and make them all sad and have to go through saying "goodbye" again. I couldn't help but look back as i walked by and i realize some other kids from the youth group go over to them to say their goodbyes. Realizing how silly i was being, i stopped, turned around and decided to back there b/c these kids knew me more than they knew the other youth kids who were saying goodbye. I walk over there and Elijah shouts out to me "Miss Briana, you'd better come give Simon a hug..." I peek in the van and i see Simon in tears. Face beat red, rubbing his eyes. I just wrapped my arms around him!! But to make it all the worse, as i'm hugging him i look to the back seat and see the little boy Clay crying as well as the girl Faith; Elijah with the saddest, most sincere look on his face.

I lost it....

I started bawling. And still, up to this day i can picture in my head each and every one of their sad, precious faces.....heartbroken, with the words goodbye on the tips of their tongues. I reassured them that i would be back next year...

I just hope that i can keep that promise-once again, God willing.

I miss all my kids sooo much and i think i would give about anything to be around them and see their bright smiling faces.

"Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." ~Psalm 37:4